When you grow up in a decent-sized town in an extraordinarily small state, receive your higher education from said state, and have been working in the same town for the past 23 years, what's the best way to occupy your dulled senses?

I guess become the mastermind of a prostitution ring. Manchester Monarchs beat writer Kevin Provencher was arrested today on felony charges related to finding financially-desperate women willing to sleep with equally desperate men. The charges state that he derived "income from prostitution." C'mon people, he's a beat writer in a small state. How much could his income be? The man needs to eat!

According to the article, one of the prostitutes allegedly complained about the 65-mile drive from Quincy to Manchester being too long so he did the gentlemanly-pimp thing of moving his operations to Andover, MA (36.5 miles). Well, this proved to be the killing of operations as authorities "could clearly hear activities consistent with sexual intercourse."

Case closed. But where am I going to get my Monarchs news from now?