[This post originally posted on March 21, 2011.]

What is your preferred jersey? " LA Kings Insider
This has been a very poorly kept secret, but the Kings are likely to change their primary uniforms next season. The current third jersey — the black jersey with the "LA" logo — is scheduled to become the full-time home jersey, while a newly created white version of that jersey would become the full-time road jersey. The current home jersey, the black-and-purple jersey with the crown logo, would become the third jersey. Is that confusing enough?

No, it's not confusing. It's terrible.

Even the infamous Burger King jersey three or four times a year -- it being so ugly and misguided that no one would ever consider it for full-time use -- is a better option than the Medieval Times jerseys FULL TIME! 

Yes, I know it would be embarrassing to pull the plug on your new re-design. Please, do it anyway. Seriously, have you not talked to the fans? I beg you to talk to some people. 

And by "people" I mean real people. 

DON'T LEAVE IT IN THE HANDS OF MARKETING PEOPLE. Market research will not get you something great, iconic, classy, or any other desirable adjective. It will get you boring and middle-of-the-road. And that's best case. 

I'm going to use bullet-points from now on, in an attempt to make my feverish anger and disappointment seem more rational. 

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[This post originally appeared on January 17, 2011.]

NHL JerseyWatch 2011 - Blog - icethetics.info
Apparently the Kings intend to toss out everything and go back to the drawing board in 2011. [...] Icethetics reported in October on photos of possible jersey prototypes seen in Luc Robitaille's office at the Kings' practice facility. They are essentially white versions of the current third jersey [...]. So if I had to guess, the crown logo along with the black and purple sweaters will disappear. Replacing them will be the LA shield logo along with black and white jerseys. And as for the third, obviously the purple and gold throwback is the front-runner. And that suspicion just got a little more meat on it last night when the Kings added nameplates to those jerseys. Surnames are a league requirement on uniforms, but they got away without them for opening night against the Canucks as they were celebrating the 40th anniversary of their first meeting — which was at a time when jerseys didn't have nameplates. So now this is a complete uniform and it looks phenomenal. Fans like it and there's no reason not to keep it around. I wouldn't be at all surprised if that's how things shake out for the Kings next season. Black and white regular unis and very colorful thirds. Of course I could be totally wrong and they could be in the process of launching an brand new identity altogether. As I've been saying, we'll really just have to wait and see.

Look. The "Medieval Times" jousting tournament jerseys are bad. They are bad because the crest looks like something from a Arthurian theme restaurant. They are bad because they remind me of that stupid plastic castle the Kings appear out of, and the castle is bad. They are bad because they're all black and white (oh, and silver, yay!), and this decade(s)-long trend toward black (Dallas, New Jersey, Anaheim, Philadelphia) must stop, because it's bad. Color is good. The Red Wings, the Leafs, the Nordiques, the Canadiens, the Oilers, those colors are rich and shimmering in HD, and beautiful. If you don't believe me, go play NHL 11 and put the Avs in the Nordiques jerseys and the Kings in their throw-back purples. See?

Go back to purple and gold. I'm sorry. "Forum blue." I don't care what you call it. But those jerseys look great. They look like hockey jerseys. They're venerable. They look like an old guy with a cigar thought of them, just like those old original six jerseys. They don't look corporate. They don't look like they were designed by market research, by committee, by focus groups. The Kings can win the cup in those jerseys. No, I'm not saying this year. But someday. They can, and should. Picture it. It just looks right.

(If it were me, I would not only go back to the purple and gold, but if I had to have a third jersey, I would use the actual black Gretzky-era chevron jerseys, not some kids-eat-free "homage" to them. And why-why-WHY when the Kings make bad jerseys do they always look like they stole them from crappy chain restaurants? The Islanders did that, too, didn't they? Weird. I guess that would be the corporate/market-research influence, again. It's probably even the same people...)

Woman flashes breasts during Canucks-Sharks telecast - thestar.com

The Vancouver Canucks have issued a statement after a woman flashed her breasts during Wednesday night’s game against San Jose. "I can confirm that the female in question was evicted from the game without incident," Jen Rollins, co-ordinator of media relations for Canucks Sports & Entertainment, wrote in an email to the Star. "We are following up with her today to help ensure incidents of this nature don’t happen again. " [...]

Yes, imagine what could happen if every time an opponent sat in the penalty box, he were to be assaulted in this manner. Vancouver would never lose. (Don't be surprised if the mystery woman turns out to be an intern of whoever is in charge of the Canuck's power play. The Kings tried a similar system this season, without success.) 

The flashing occurred in the third period when, with 2:33 left, San Jose Shark Ben Eager skated to the penalty box for his fourth penalty of the night. Then a woman wearing a Henrik Sedin jersey pressed herself against the glass and lifted up her top. She pressed her breasts against the glass of the penalty box and wriggled them around for six seconds before putting her top back down. The Canucks won 7-3 [...]

Jeff Keay, head of media relations for CBC, said the breasts were captured by an in-house camera.

Makes it sound like they were apprehended. 

I can't remember the last time I encountered "wriggled them around" in a news story. In a national newspaper, no less.

[...] The Green Men, who typically sit in the seats by the penalty box to agitate opposing players, tweeted earlier Wednesday that they would not be attending that evening’s game. [...] After the game, [they tweeted]: "I know we couldn’t be there but I hope we sent a suitable replacement (or is it replacements?)"

The NHL had announced they would be cracking down on the Green Men, saying the two Vancouver fans would not be allowed to touch the glass of the penalty box or do handstands. [...] "It’s a liability thing," [a green man said].

[...] The CBC hopes fans will act appropriately at games. "We appreciate the enthusiasm of hockey fans and trust they'll use their best judgment with regard to proper decorum at games." The NHL has yet to comment on the events at Wednesday night’s game.

It’s unknown if the mystery woman will face any penalty.

Hooking? No, not hooking. But I know there's a joke in there somewhere...

[if you follow the link, there is video with a black rectangle over the key plot points]

...unfortunately...

Damn interwebs!

Colin Campbell feels unappreciated. He wants a big thank you from the fans, for his tireless etc.

NHL disciplinarian Colin Campbell: 'Thankless job? Yeah, it's thankless' - ESPN

NHL vice president Colin Campbell was defensive Wednesday when talking about the criticism he has received over suspensions. [...]

"Thankless job? Yeah, it's thankless," he said. "Especially at this time of year when there's so much at play here with the playoffs and cities are involved. When you rule on certain situations, all of a sudden you become public enemy No. 1 so ... Am I pissed off right now? Yeah, I'm pissed off."

Campbell also took issue with anonymous comments from general managers opposing his decisions. "I don't make up this stuff as I go along"

:)

"We do lots of work on this. We send out lots of videos.

Look. Some of us pay to watch hockey. One of the things we require is that all of the f***ing rules are disclosed. Even my seven year-old knows you can't play a game if you don't know the rules. Even my seven year-old knows that the kid who keeps pulling secret rules out of his *** is a cheater or a bully or both. 

If you don't know all of the rules, you don't know the rules. 

"You think I want to do the popular thing here? I don't get paid to do the popular thing. I don't get paid to do the easy thing to do," he said.

Right, but since you are paid to do this unpopular thing, why are you complaining about it? It's in your job description. Being unpopular, for you, is a tax deduction. 

Campbell strongly disagreed that either of the hits Sidney Crosby suffered leading up to his absence with a concussion was worthy of a suspension. "You guys are crazy when you say that," Campbell said. "What do you want to do to the game? You're nuts. There are some hits out there that we don't like, but ... Come on, you guys. You can't say that was dirty, you guys. ... You can't say that hit was dirty or you guys don't watch hockey." Crosby absorbed a blindside hit to the head from then-Washington Capitals forward David Steckel during the Winter Classic outdoor game on Jan. 1. He was then checked into the boards by Tampa Bay Lightning defenseman Victor Hedman on Jan. 5 and has not played a game since.

That the Penguins allowed Crosby to continue playing while concussed is bafflingly stupid and, I think, negligent. Everyone knows it's the second concussion on top of the first (not yet healed) one that does the damage. I didn't know anyone pinned that on Campbell though. 

There have been a number of questionable hits in this postseason already. "I've got a responsibility to try and protect players from other players in the game of hockey but yet keep the physicality in the game," Campbell said. "To keep jobs like your jobs, everyone's jobs. The game supplies a lot of jobs."

Interesting. Translation: "I've got a responsibility to try to protect the players if that's possible while not hurting profits." What's the point of saying, "to keep jobs like your jobs" (aside: kind of a threat, really), "the game supplies a lot of jobs" unless to really actually protect the players would COST US JOBS?

Jobs = money.

Frankly, I'm surprised he came right out and said it. 

Note that he did not say, "if you make hits to the head illegal, it will make players less willing to hit at all, which will make the game less fun to play and less fun to watch." What he said was, "jobs." 

"We would like to try to protect you, if we can do it and not lose money. But if we're going to lose money, sorry, here's your drool cup, dumbass." 

(Just to be clear, that's a paraphrase.)

Still, there's something he's not saying.  It's the elephant in the room of the head-shot issue. It's...

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NHL needs to pay Wayne Gretzky, reestablish prominent relationship with star - ESPN

The NHL playoffs began this week, and for the second consecutive postseason the question of why Wayne Gretzky doesn't have an official job or even a very high profile in the league remains a sensitive one. Some hockey insiders will only discuss the issue on background [...]. Gretzky -- never one to roil the waters -- has repeatedly denied there's a rift between him and the NHL, even though he's still owed $8 million on the contract he had when his last team, the Phoenix Coyotes, went into bankruptcy in 2009 and the NHL bought the Coyotes [...]. [...P]aying Gretzky what he's owed has been discussed by the NHL's remaining 29 owners during the long, often difficult, effort to resell the Coyotes. So what's the hang-up? The sharply worded reasons given when I call and ask league insiders are startling:

"Every one of the 29 owners is part owner of the Coyotes now, and they're not looking to spend a penny more, OK? … Who gives any coach or GM $8 million a year anyway? That was a mistake. No wonder that franchise went into bankruptcy. … Wayne's done all right in life. He's just having a little pout. … There was a lot of support to pay him. There was also sentiment the franchise went down and he should suffer like everyone else who got stiffed."

I'm not at all surprised that "league insiders" are willing to talk trash behind a guy's back. Bunch of cowards.

Gretzky isn't "like everyone else." [...H]e is easily the NHL's most important figure of the past 30 years. [...] He took the Los Angeles Kings to a Stanley Cup finals and proved hockey could work in U.S. Sun Belt states. He put together the 2002 Olympic squad that won Canada's first men's hockey gold medal in 50 years.

Yet some of the same owners -- who saw their pockets lined and franchise values lifted by the sheer magnetism of Gretzky's game and crossover appeal and tireless promotion of the sport -- now don't want to do the right thing by one of the classiest superstars they've ever had?

Reminds me of how a different NHL group treated another ambassador. From Wikipedia:

Bobby Orr - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
Orr was also involved in the 1991 lawsuit of retired NHL players against the NHL over its control of the players' pension fund.[108] Eagleson was involved there too, arranging for the players to give up a seat on the trusteeship of the pension fund in 1969 to gain the acceptance of the NHLPA with the NHL owners. Orr and ex-Bruin Dave Forbes discussed the law suit with the sports newspaper The National. Orr: "Our money is being used to pay pensions for current players".[109] The NHL's response was to file a notice of libel and slander against Orr and Forbes.[109] Carl Brewer defended Orr in a letter to then-NHL president John Ziegler: "It is regrettable that the NHL and the member clubs would resort to such treatment of one of our game's icons, Bobby Orr. 

Back to ESPN/Gretzky:

[...] Dave Checketts, the current St. Louis Blues chairman and former chief executive of the New York Rangers, admitted he tried to make a case for honoring Gretzky's Phoenix contract at a league executive meeting he participated in 2009. "There was some discussion, in terms of the league taking over the Coyotes franchise, about what they actually owed Wayne because, look, in a traditional bankruptcy the guys who are owed money are out of luck, basically," Checketts said. "[...]He has always been a great ambassador for the NHL. He's the biggest name the league has ever had. I think we have to do everything we have to do to make him whole in this deal. "'It would be different if we were selling this team to some Mr. X. But we're selling it to the NHL, and I think we have an obligation to do right by him.'" [...]  NHL deputy commissioner Bill Daly, responding to several questions via email Wednesday, wrote: "Any decision to pay Mr. Gretzky directly by the League would be ex gratia" -- which means done with a sense of moral obligation, rather than a legal requirement -- "and would be a decision made by the full board of governors."

[...] Gretzky has repeatedly refused to publicly acknowledge that he's angry or bitter about the NHL's position. His typical public response is that he has been enjoying his time away from the game with his family and "Everything I have in my life, I owe to hockey and to the National Hockey League." 

I think we both know. 

Heidi Androl - Los Angeles Kings - Team -- LA Kings Official Website

Now in her third season as the female face of the Los Angeles Kings and the Manager of Production for Kings Vision, she has helped to increase viewership on the [Kings] team’s Web site and broadcasts since 2007. [...] In her first year with the team she was deemed one of Los Angeles’ up and coming sportscasters and she continues her quest towards being the best. Heidi has enjoyed her many features with the Kings, whether it was the Pre-Season in Salzburg, Austria and opening the season in London, dog sledding and curling in the Canadian Rockies or just covering a [Kings] practice at the Toyota Sports Center. All have given the [Kings] fans a unique inside look at the Los Angeles Kings. Heidi claims getting a hard time from [Kings' announcers] Bob, Jim and Patrick each night on the [Kings] telecast, getting to know the [Kings] fans personally and seeing the [Kings] team transform on the ice are the biggest joys of the job! Prior to joining the Kings, Heidi worked in the Aerospace industry which led to her appearance on Donald Trump’s “The Apprentice” where she starred in 13 out of 14 episodes.

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