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IT'S ALMOST CHRISTMAS, SO WE PILE IN THE CAR

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Christmas Eve, 2009

Dean Lombardi is in the driver's seat. He has a license and has driven many miles. We sit in the back seat and shout out instructions, and we don't even know how to drive. Dean Lombardi grinds his teeth. Sometimes, we backseat drivers argue amongst ourselves. "Don't touch me! Make him stop touching me!" Dean Lombardi says, "Don't make me come back there." In the back seat, we have little boosters so we can see out the window. Dean Lombardi has locked the doors and windows from a switch on the dash. This is for our own safety. Otherwise, we would jump out of the moving vehicle. We know the doors and windows open, and that Dean Lombardi is somehow stopping them from opening, just as he is stopping us from getting where we're going. He could go faster if he wanted to. That's why we kick the back of his seat. Dean Lombardi blocks us out and focuses on the road.

Christmas Eve, 2010

"Are we there yet? Are we there yet?"