- How many Kovalchuks does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
- Knock, knock. [who's there?] Kovalchuk. Kovalchuk who?
- Why did Kovalchuk cross the road?
Submit your punchlines in the comments.
[UPDATE: my favorite one so far....
Q: "Why did Kovalchuk cross the road?"
A: "He thought he had a deal."