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Kings First Semester Grades

[NOTE: Player grades are, first of all, capricious, pretentious and stupid; second, players are graded against themselves, not against each other; i.e. a knuckle-dragger A+ doesn’t mean he’s better than a superstar with a C]

  • Smyth: Transformed Kopitar, exceeded all expectations, then got hurt, and Kopitar turned into last year’s model. A
  • Simmonds: After stunning everyone by making the team out of juniors last year, all he’s done is made people think he might actually be able to play top-six. Has had probably the fewest weak shifts of any King. A
  • Doughty: A
  • Quick: Spectacular, with hiccups, but so what. A
  • Jones: probably should get docked some points for the odd mistake or two, but his numbers are great; and the team’s record with him in the line-up speaks for itself. A
  • SOD: boring and solid, just like he should be. A-
  • Greene: boring and solid, Jr. A-
  • Scuderi: The hipcheck was clean. He’s an excellent Quincey (though I still miss Quincey), with some hiccups. A-
  • Parse: After a couple of underwhelming years hobbled in the AHL, he blew everyone away, gradually became less effective, got sent down, got recalled, and blew everyone away again. Made me look really smart for advocating on his behalf over the years. A-
  • Johnson: Starting to see the offense, yay. Still making those goal-causing mistakes. Nevertheless, it’s a step in the right direction. B+/A-
  • Williams: Exceeded everyone’s expectations when healthy, but then also managed to get injured twice, confirming at least partially everyone’s fears. If he didn’t have a broken leg, he would have a higher grade. B+
  • Handzus: A few weird giveaways, but still basically the quiet rock at the center of the team defense. Also is channeling Holmstrom in front of the net. B+
  • Richardson: A C+ for the first half and an A+ for the second half. B+
  • Segal: I am tempted to give him an A just for how pissed off Jovonovski was at him. That was great. B
  • Stoll: He was non-existent until Parse came into his life, then he played like he was supposed to in the first place. B
  • Drewiske: Not as good as last year, but no one thought he would be here. If he had never played last season and this year was the first we saw of him, we’d be happier because we wouldn’t have seen the better version. B-
  • Brown: Continuing his underwhelming performance from last season, which is starting to seem like a problem to me. I’m not going to mention the penalty shot. B-
  • Moller: Gained muscle over the summer and yet somehow seemed to get smaller. Was a little bit off at camp. Great in Manchester with Loktionov and Parse (a.k.a. The Future). Called up, was okay. Sent down. Was great again in Manchester. Called up again, was better. I love Moller. I just noticed Holmstrom is only 5’11”. I think that’s where Oscar is heading, with more skill. For now: B-
  • Frolov: He’s sneakily now second in goals (11) to the stagnant Kopitar. I had him pegged for 35-40 this year, and he’s on a pace for 23. He still can get to 30 with a great second half, and I feel optimistic tonight. What the hell it’s New Year’s Eve. C+
  • Elkins: one great goal, one bad giveaway. Still, it’s remarkable he’s played with the big club at all. C+
  • Kopitar: An A for the first half and a D for the second half. C+
  • Ivanans: much improved on defense (and his numbers reflect this); still takes dumb penalties. C+
  • Martinez: not ready for prime time, but that’s okay. He got a taste, now he can do his homework and come back later. He’s got time. C
  • Ersberg: Terrible, then good, then terrible, then great and terrible. Not inspiring confidence in anyone, really. For a back-up, that’s bad. C-
  • Purcell: It’s not all his fault. He gets a solid A for defense, positioning, effort, and for being on the ice for the lowest number of goals against on the team. Offensively, he gets a A+ for two goals in the first week of the season, and an F for the rest of it. Overall: D
  • Lewis: riding the Boyle train. Now injured. F
  • Schenn: played one game and basically audited the class. Or maybe he took it pass/fail. Pass.
  • Loktionov: Went pro at 19, scored a hat trick in his first AHL game, led the AHL for awhile in points, +/- and led all rookies for longer. Gets an A+ for all of that. But, obviously, didn’t quite get through his first game. Incomplete.
  • Harrold: has played just fine; hasn’t had any of those sporadic flashy games like he did last year, but maybe this is because he’s getting in fewer games. Incomplete./

Also…

  • Terry Murray: has been far more consistent with the lines this year. Team is playing way above expectations. Short list for coach of the year. Now making bitchy comments to press. A
  • Lombardi: Williams trade, win. Smyth trade, win. Jones pick-up, win. A/

Happy New Year.

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