LET’S GET SILLY: Imagining Los Angeles Kings (Org) Players as Candies

Something fun to think about during the long break this week

Editor’s note: Introducing a new series: LET’S GET SILLY. The season is a bust as the team bounces between last place and slightly above last place. With that being said, LET’S GET SILLY.

There’s not a lot of activity going on this week as the Los Angeles Kings are in the midst of a very long break following this weekend’s All Star festivities. So we at JFTC imagined players in the organization (not just limited to the NHL squad) as candies. Why? For fun. See note above.

Players as Candies

Willie DesjardinsMirageWe thought he was a coach. It was a Mirage.
Jonathan QuickLicoriceControversial as to whether he's/it's good and/or overrated
Jack CampbellLife saversBecause he's saved the Kings' butts on more than one occasion
Adrian KempeSnickersHe's adorable and maybe a little nutty at times but always enjoyable to watch
Kyle CliffordJolly ranchersBecause he's a tough guy but underneath, is pretty sweet (especially when he's scoring goals)
Jonny BrodzinskiReese's CupsIt's fine. It's not great but it's not, like, super awful. It's something that could be better but also something that you keep eating anyway
Tyler ToffoliTaffyTyler Taff-oli
Nate ThompsonDairy Milkliterally the most basic candy on the planet. Nate Thompson is a hockey player. Is he good? Eh. Will he do? Eh, sure why not?
Anze KopitarYork Peppermint PattyHe's cool, crisp, dignified, and versitile. When you bite into it it packs a punch.
Ilya KovalchukFlakeAn import that’s not as good as you hoped it would be
Carl HagelinSur SkumfiskA Swedish delight and Hagelin is turning out to be just that! (When healthy, of course)
Brendan LeipsicMilky WayMasquerades as a Snickers replacement, but actually not so bad when you give it a chance
Dustin BrownNestle CrunchKing of the big crunch. King of the Toyota Tough Hit of the Game.
Alex IafalloSmartiesHe went to college??
Trevor LewisButterfingersWell, he's not great at holding on to the puck
Jeff CarterHot tamaleHe's really hot
Austin WagnerAeroHe's speedy and "aero" sounds fast
Matt LuffEat-MoreHe's young and fun and we'd all like to see "more" of him!
Alec MartinezHershey KissesBecause he's beautiful and we want to give him kisses
Drew DoughtyWhoppersHis hits are always Whoppers.
Paul LaDueCandy cornApparently Willie Desjardins thinks Paul LaDue is candy corn because he never plays (and candy corn is terrible)
Dion PhaneufButterscotch hard candybecause he's old lol and like grandfathers always had these
Jake MuzzinSour patch kidsHis hits can leave opponents sour but it's sweet to have him on our team
Oscar FantenbergSwedish fishHe's Swedish?
Derek ForbortHershey's chocolate barjust your standard candy bar ... nothing flashy about it ... it exists and gets the job done
That '70s Line3 MusketeersWe miss you, Tanner
Kings teamSweetartThere've been a lot of sour but also sweet moments in 50 years
Cal PetersenPeanut M&MsHe's a goalie so that makes him a little weird to begin with and apparently has a personality to match
Daniel BrickleyMr. BigHe was a highly prized UFA signing in the spring of 2018
Gabriel VilardiKit KatHe breaks a lot and you break off a piece of that kit kat bar
Jaret Anderson-DolanRoloA delightful center
Mikey AndersonTwizzlersHe dazzled at the WJC and had a few move twisting the opposition inside out....
Rasmus KupariSalmiakkiHe's Finnish and so is this candy!
Spencer WatsonSkittlesSmall but mighty in flavor and in his skill
Akil ThomasCoffee crispA speedy winger and Canadian and coffee gives you good energy to do things fast
Alex DergachyovMaltesersClassic power forward that is maybe or maybe not good?
Sheldon RempalNerdsUm he was in the NCAA?
Matt VillaltaPal o MineGoalies are always the best pals to have on your team
Jacob MoverareSkorHas a Swedish name and um he's Swedish?
Kurtis MacDermidTootsie popsHard outside. How many licks to the center (of his talent)?
Kale ClaguewunderbarHe has a "wunder"ful name that fits in with the city of Los Angeles
Alex LintuniemiFazer BlueA staple in Finnish culture, it's not flashy but is reliable nonetheless and Lintuniemi emulates that pretty well
Mike EyssimontStarburstHe isn't going to be a star but he is bursting with energy
Nikita ScherbakMANGONot a candy, he's an actual mango, like the fruit

So what did you think? Let us know in the comments below if you agree or disagree with our choices or if we missed a candy or player that should totally be on here!